Grounding The Flimsy In Beings' History

It was a real difficult conundrum when I no longer wanted the world to seem unreal or just a dream or appearance, when this was becoming more limiting to my life than freeing overall, and as I was starting to explore other spiritual perspectives that didn’t negate nor insubstantiate the outer and inner human world, or reduce all phenomena to mere illusion, dream, or false reality.

One of the common ways people describe what happens to their experience of personhood, when they go deep into either/or self-negating spirituality, is that their sense of self, as well even their physicality and world around them becomes increasingly flimsy, and difficult to hold up.

While that was my experience when my spiritual path was one of unbecoming, a deconstruction project (which started out positively transformative, then thrust me into its' unforeseen shadow side) I've been reveling in, and grateful for how reality is so far from flimsy, now that years later, this moment and everything in it has got the entire trajectory of evolution as an anchor that is not only backing it, but is (contained within) it, having emerged through the gloriously both/and unfolding of "Being," no longer unbecoming or unraveling its' manifold forms, but becoming all of this!

Savoring with wonder, how this moment, and everything I'm perceiving with my 5 senses in every here and now,  is both the culmination and leading edge of the creative process of a universe expressing itself in ways that are equally unfathomable now as they were before they existed! Hydrogen evolving itself into potted plants and my balcony they bring luscious life to, the dust from exploded stars crystalizing somehow into every level of evolution that gave rise to US living, breathing, laughing, crying fleshly human beings. Astonishingly, even the surface of and typically "superficial" things, from plastic spoons, to TV commercials and simple small-talk have a palpable, mind-blowing depth, when what feels like a new kind of depth-perception - an evolutionary or historical depth-perception opens up, and surprisingly, bitterness seems to soften into a curious sort of brightness (that doesn't negate shadows!), and tender-hearted celebration of reality, reverence for the fact that anything, any of us exist at all, that propels me into awe-inspired participation.

What a journey it has been. It's was so easy and seemingly obvious from a reductionist non-dual worldview to make the physical and psychic arisings a flimsy illusion, but it’s much harder to do that with 14 billion years of evolution, but 14 billion years of evolution withstands the promptings of reductionist nonduality and the scene before me, including me as a co-arising part of it, continue to shine with our reality, that from the emergent perspective of "Being" becoming cannot and will not be raized and reduced down our formless foundation, and no longer is the essence of things more real, valuable, "spiritual" or divine, than what that essence, like a seed, has flowered into!

This scene isn’t just floating isolated, as in my new perspective, I feel it sprout roots that reach backwards, downwards through all of evolutionary to the intangible, fertile soil of that "ground," that numinous womb that before giving birth to its' own potential, carried it for all of timelessness. These roots of course have always been there, and these evolutionary threads weaving the universe together, the thread of interdependence that tethers every/thing to every/thing ( presently and all the way back through all of time!) but they're new for me to sense viscerally, a solidarity between all things, the fortification of the once only illusory content on a screen that contemplative inquiries could strip reality from faster than I could say "I am THAT."

But this is not reverting to the same old way of perceiving reality before my non-dual deconstruction-only path - it's so different because now evolution is not just a material process, but the process of that immaterial "ground," of Being itself, blossoming into and as all of this, including both matter and the imaginal, or psychic realms of reality.

So it's a shock, looking back at how I once had to dissolve and vanish into my own absence, had to lose myself to/in the "ground of Being" - only now to have discovered that yes, it's still true "I am that" - but what's not true is the "...and not this" - since today not only am I that, but most significantly, I am that as this! Individually, personally, physically - mine and yours is now timeless spirits' time-bound physicality. Perhaps I never had to radically strip myself or any thing away to experience this, but of course I'll never know, perhaps only that path would have led me to this, and for others it's not necessary to go through the pitfall-laden dissolution path to back and infuse the moment, including all of material and immaterial reality with this special kind of profound mystery that is supercharged by it's monumentally awe-some history 🌌

Here are some inspirations!

Journey of the Universe - Brian Swimme
Beyond Essence - Full essay from Essays on the Heart of Enlightenment - Jason Shulman


Popular posts from this blog

Spiritualizing Trauma Responses - Rupert Spira - Total Dis-embodiment

Dangerous Side of De-Activating the Default Mode Network

Non-dualism Cult Dynamics - The "Sleepers Awake!" Belief System

The Universe's Past: A Portal to Presence!